About this series

Open Apocalypse is a satirical civil-defence information series. It is not an official government publication. It is not medical, legal, or emergency advice. It is not affiliated with OpenAI, Anthropic, xAI, or any laboratory. It is not the X-COM: Apocalypse remake known as OpenApoc, which lives at openapoc.org. It is not aipocalypse.ai. The Office over-stamps. That is the bit.

Worst case, as filed, is disappointment. Novelty died. Wrappers were not companies. Depression-med stocks soared. GPT-6 beat Portal in three times normal time and nobody is watching. At year-end they pulled a ceremonial plug. An intern plugged it back in so Slack would work.

The Office has only one stamp. The stamp says FLASH.